A biblioblogger visits the local branch library

by Steve

If you know who shameless self-promoter and alpha geek Cory Doctorow is, and/or you read boingboing, you may find the little skit Cory Doctorow visits a Radio Shack funny. I know that I did. (If you don’t know who he is, skip it. It’s one big inside joke.)

As soon as I read it, I thought, “I need to rip off pay homage to this funny scene by re-writing it as ‘A biblioblogger visits the local branch library.'”

It’s meant in fun, and I’m not trying to parody any one of us in particular: l’biblioblogger c’est moi, as Flaubert never said.

A biblioblogger visits the local branch library


Originally uploaded by Underpuppy.

(SCENE: a small suburban branch of a public library. BRANCH LIBRARIAN is at the reference desk. BIBLIOBLOGGER enters with laptop.)

BIBLIOBLOGGER: Hey, I’m a new librarian in town and thought I’d stop by and introduce myself. Perhaps you know my blog, Library 3.0 Has a Posse? Where can I get the feed for your library blog?

BRANCH LIBRARIAN: I’m afraid we don’t have a blog.

BIBLIOBLOGGER: Oh, you have already moved on to podcasting, then?

BRANCH LIBRARIAN: No, I do our webpages in Microsoft FrontPage.

BIBLIOBLOGGER: (chokes) Whoa! Maybe someday that will be old skool, but right now that is just perverse. We’ll hop on #code4lib and get you hooked up with a Drupal-based open-source CMS portal authoring environment that validates to XHTML 1.1 but is fully backwards-compatible and future-proof.


BIBLIOBLOGGER: (opening laptop) Don’t mention it. Hey the wi-fi signal in here is weak.

BRANCH LIBRARIAN: I’m sorry, we don’t have wireless.

BIBLIOBLOGGER: OK, well, let me run my Portable Firefox from my USB drive on one of your public-access computers…

BRANCH LIBRARIAN: We don’t allow patrons to use USB drives. The IT guys won’t let us. MySpace and IM are blocked, too.

BIBLIOBLOGGER: Say no more. I understand. Just give me a Google Map to the IT guy’s home and I’ll get Sauers to rub him out. When are people going to realize that if they don’t “get it,” they are going to “GET IT,” know what I mean? I’m sure you are on Flickr though?

BRANCH LIBRARIAN: Yes, I have to apologize for that, we were supposed to have someone come in to look at the lights last week.

BIBLIOBLOGGER: No, not “flicker”–Flickr! It’s where you can share photos of all the great activities you are doing here. I’ll show you the photos of my Livin’ Large Print hip-hop night for seniors program at my last library. Have you thought of having a Marshall Stacks in the Fiction Stacks heavy metal night here?

BRANCH LIBRARIAN: I don’t think we are zoned for that…

BIBLIOBLOGGER: Ajax del.icio.us OPML Creative Commons radical trust mashup widget!


BIBLIOBLOGGER: I didn’t say anything. So just how much does your OPAC suck?


BIBLIOBLOGGER: Oh, don’t be self-conscious about it. Birds gotta fly, fish gotta swim, OPACs gotta suck. Man, the last library I was at, we had the suckiest OPAC to ever suck! I was gonna replace it with a wiki and just let the users catalog the collection.

BRANCH LIBRARIAN: We do have some online innovations here. We allow patrons to pay fines online via PayPal.

BIBLIOBLOGGER: You still have fines? I’m sorry, my friend, but the Cluetrain is about to pull into the station, and you are looking like Anna Karenina, if you get my drift.

BRANCH LIBRARIAN: Ah! A literary allusion! Yes, I understand perfectly, though I’m not flattered.

BIBLIOBLOGGER: Hey, don’t take offense. Tell you what, I’m doing a thing in Second Life tomorrow called Exhuming the Paleolibrary that is designed for people just like you. Have your avatar ping my avatar and we can have Second Lunch.

BRANCH LIBRARIAN: That sounds…fascinating.


BIBLIOBLOGGER: Um, where is the bathroom?